Sunday Firesides: You Are Not Responsible for Other People’s Feelings


“I can’t break up with her; she’d be devastated.”

“I can’t quit my job; it would stress out my co-workers.”

“I can’t say no to helping out with this event; my friend would be really frustrated.”

These are the kinds of things that run through many men’s minds — especially those of the “Nice Guy” type — when they think about making a decision that will affect other people. Even contemplating making such a choice fills them dread and anxiety; they feel emotional upset . . . at the prospect of creating emotional upset in another. 

What they don’t realize is this: You are not responsible for other people’s feelings.

Now, don’t get me wrong, the fact that you’re not responsible for other people’s feelings, doesn’t mean you’re not responsible for your actions towards them. You should fulfill your promises and moral obligations. You should treat people ethically and civilly. It’s a bunch of bullocks when someone sneers that they couldn’t help the fact that someone else chose to be offended, when they made it almost impossible for that person to react in any other way.

But when your decision doesn’t carry moral import, and you make it with all the politeness and respect possible, then you’re not responsible for how the other person deals with your choice. Whether they deal with it resiliently or not, rationally or not, generously or not, is up to them. You cannot control their reaction. And you cannot make your own decisions based on their expected response.

The human experience is difficult enough in only managing your own emotional ecosystem; it is infinitely more so if you try to manage yours, along with everyone else’s.

The post Sunday Firesides: You Are Not Responsible for Other People’s Feelings appeared first on The Art of Manliness.

from The Art of Manliness

Some of the most popular YouTubers make millions from their videos. Here’s how you can make some money from your YouTube channel too. (GOOGL)



  • YouTube stars with large fan bases and popular videos can earn millions of dollars a year from their content, but you don’t have to have millions of subscribers to make some cash off the videos you post on the service.
  • If you have enough people watching your YouTube videos, you can earn money from them through the service’s Partner Program.
  • Here’s how to find out if you’re eligible for the program and how to join it.
  • Visit Business Insider’s homepage for more stories.

YouTube personalities including PewDiePie, the Paul brothers, and Jenna Marbles have made millions of dollars from their YouTube videos.

But you don’t have to be a megastar like one of them with millions of views to make money off your YouTube videos. Anyone who meets certain requirements can make some extra cash on the streaming video service through the YouTube Partner Program.

Here are the standards your channel needs to meet to qualify, how you can apply, and how the program works:

SEE ALSO: These are the 23 most popular YouTube stars in the world

To earn money on YouTube, video creators need to be accepted into the service’s Partner Program.

Once you become part of the program, you’ll have access to a trove of resources and features provided by YouTube. The program offers tips on the different ways you can make money and provides a dedicated support team.

Source: YouTube Help

To qualify for the YouTube Partner Program, your channel has to have at least 1,000 subscribers and 4,000 watch-hours in the last year.

YouTube sets such requirements for the program to "protect the creator community from spammers, impersonators, and other bad actors," it says.

Source: YouTube Creators

To be eligibile, you have to live in a country where the Partner Program is available.

YouTube offers the program in more than 100 countries, including the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, India, Russia, and Norway. One country where it’s not available is China.

Source: YouTube Help

See the rest of the story at Business Insider

from SAI

Why Showtime’s ‘Billions’ Is Currently The Coolest Show On TV

brian koppelman billions interview


The most successful and greatest TV series share 3 commonalities: exceptional writing, memorable characters, and outstanding casting.

Showtime’s Billions is one of these shows, and for my money, The Coolest Show on TV right now. What separates the Brian Koppelman-created series from other critically acclaimed bro-centric hits, like, say, Entourage (which I loved) is that the former HBO series thought it was “cool.” Billions knows it!

I asked Koppelman to reflect on his time running the oxymoronically popular niche series, which is now in its fourth season and currently starring the remarkable foursome of Paul Giamatti, Damian Lewis, Maggie Siff, and Asia Kate Dillon. Our exchange took place over an app which remains in play with all the cool kids (and just as many as the not so cool ones).


“Axe”- “Dollar Bill” – “Wags” & last names used in place of first names, “Mafee.”

Even guest stars get anointed with cool name drops like this past week’s ‘Chicken Man.’

A Plethora Of Colorful Characters

Eccentric billionaire hedge fund managers, powerful and corrupt law officers and a tough as nails therapist, all living multiple lives, are only the beginning of the rich palette.

It’s rare for an ensemble cast to have so many complex, deeply-disturbed, intense characters but that’s exactly how you’d describe the entire group of Billions.

The Seven Deadly Sins

Pride, greed, lust, envy, gluttony, wrath and sloth.

All of them run rampant throughout the series. Yeah, so what you say, right? We’ve seen them before. Oh, not like this you have. Billions successfully delivers EACH of the ‘Seven Deadly Sins’ within EVERY episode.

Nothing cooler than that my twisted friends.

The Soundtrack

Bruce Springsteen AND Little Steven Van Zandt & The Disciples of Soul….and that was just this past week’s episode!

Consistently, the best music soundtrack in the history of TV with a playlist featuring Black Sabbath and Metallica to Al Green and The Boss. It’s like a weekly Scorsese film.


Scenes with bondage, dominatrix, masochism, escorts, strippers, personal trainers, threesomes… yet, even with all that- ordinary ‘ole missionary still appears cool, when shown on screen.

Gender Neutral

Men, Women and They…all equal, cool cucumbers at work and at play. Just badass people being badasses in work environments without a lean into gender norms or archetypes.

Defining Moment

Season 3 – Episode 8: “All the Wilburys”

In this landmark episode, the geekiest character (compliance officer Ari Spyros) attempts to assert himself into the cool kids club, but he’s quickly put in his proper place by the show’s ‘King of Cool,’ Bobby Axelrod. Axe declares Spyros lacks the winning ticket of “wit, cool, and credibility” that Bob Dylan and Tom Petty required for their supergroup, the Traveling Wilburys. In one clean swoop, Axe hammers home the hierarchy and precious fundamentals of the show.

Normally, this would be too “on the nose” to be “cool,” but it just works so well within the context of the episode and addresses the Billions world with such extraordinary perfection that it may be the singular defining moment in the series.


Gulfstream’s, Lambo’s and Bentley’s…oh my. Check out the Mercedes-AMG GT from Season 4’s Chicken Man episode. It’s beautiful.

Recurring Guest Star

For Billions, Koppelman went back to the ornery Russian well by casting Malkovich as yet another Russkie badass. Koppelman’s now caught lightning in a bottle twice with Malkovich on screen- first as a ruthless, red gangster poker player in the brilliant poker flick, Rounders- and now a second time, as a dangerous oligarch, in Billions.


New York City.

Stop. Don’t even try. The city that never sleeps is always where the world’s coolest action resides, especially in the high stakes finance world. The show couldn’t possibly exist anywhere else.


Nibbled-on bones found in a cave revealed that our Neanderthal ancestors ate each other. Scientists may have figured out why.



  • New evidence from a cave in France might explain why some Neanderthals ate their compatriots about 100,000 years ago.
  • The bones found in the cave aren’t the first evidence of Neanderthal cannibalism, but this is the first time scientists have hypothesized about the reasons Neanderthals became cannibals.
  • The scientists suggest that after the Earth underwent a period of rapid warming, environmental changes limited the available prey for Neanderthals. Facing starvation, our ancestor cousins started eating one another.

Some 100,000 years ago, six of our Neanderthal cousins met a grisly end at the hands of their compatriots.

In a cave in southeastern France, two adults, two adolescents between the ages of 12 and 15, and two children as young as 4 were eaten by other Neanderthals.

Archaeologists have long accepted that Neanderthals were occasional cannibals. The skeletons found at the cave site showed clear evidence of human consumption, like cut marks and nibbled-on finger bones.

But the reason for that behavior hasn’t been well understood until now.

In a study published this month in the Journal of Archaeological Science, French researchers suggested that Neanderthals were reluctant cannibals who were forced to eat one another when they had no other readily available food sources.

Why was there so little to eat? Climate change.

"It took exceptional conditions for human flesh to become meat," Alban Defleur, an author of the study, told Business Insider.

Neanderthal Evolution

A cave that remained undisturbed for tens of thousands of years

The roughly 120 bones found from these six unfortunate victims of cannibalism were discovered during the 1990s, in the small cave of Baume Moula-Guercy in the Rhône Valley in southeastern France. Defleur coauthored a 1999 study in the journal Science that documented the findings.

"More than half of these remains showed cut marks made with flint tools," Defleur said.

That clue, along with signs of bludgeoning on the Neanderthals’ femurs and skulls, indicated that the brains, marrow, and flesh had been consumed.


Nearly two decades after that initial finding, Defleur and his coauthor, Emmanuel Desclaux, attempted to figure out why these individuals had been consumed by members of their own species.

To do that, the scientists examined a specific layer of the cave: Layer XV.

The Baume Moula-Guercy cave has 19 archaeological layers superimposed in chronological order, representing a period of about 100,000 years. This meant the researchers could compare the types of species that lived together during different chunks of time and what the climate was like during those periods.

Layer XV — just 16 inches thick — included not only the cannibalized Neanderthal remains but everything else they left behind, including preserved remnants of fireplaces, charcoal, flint tools, and animal bones. These items had been fossilized without disruption, in a layer "unparalleled on the European continent" for fossilized remains from that period, Defleur said.

Climate change limited Neanderthals’ hunting

The contents of Layer XV revealed what the environment was like between 128,000 and 114,000 years ago, during a time called the last interglacial period (meaning between ice ages).

The Baume Moula-Guercy cave site is rare; very few archaeological sites from this interglacial period exist, Defleur said. So researchers have little insight into how climate changes affected Neanderthals’ way of life.

Defleur and Desclaux found that the Neanderthals’ climate was up to 4 degrees Fahrenheit warmer than today’s and that it had changed from colder to warmer incredibly quickly.


This shift was the most significant global warming our planet has experienced in the past 400,000 years, Defleur said.

"We’re not [talking] in terms of geological scale, but more a human scale," Desclaux told Cosmos magazine last month. "Maybe within a few generations, the landscape totally changed."

What’s more, the fossilized animal bones helped the researchers discover what European wildlife was like before, during, and after this period of abrupt warming.

Defleur and Desclaux found that the changes in the climate led to the development of thick forests across Europe, and consequently, the disappearance of the large mammal species that Neanderthals typically hunted, like bison, reindeer, and mammoths. This lack of traditional prey left them without enough food, which is perhaps why they resorted to cannibalism.

Reluctant cannibals

According to the study’s authors, an important piece of evidence supporting their hypothesis that Neanderthals ate members of their own species only out of desperation comes from the enamel on the dead Neanderthals’ teeth. An analysis of their molars indicated serious and prolonged deficiencies that are signs of malnourishment.

Read more: Ancient tooth plaque reveals what our extinct human relatives really ate

Defleur said that researchers behind similar enamel studies at other two other sites where cannibalized Neanderthals were discovered found the same signs.

Of the 220 European sites that have yielded human remains belonging to the Neanderthal lineage, only four, including this one, have evidence of Neanderthal cannibalism, according to the study’s authors. The other three are in Croatia, Belgium, and Spain.

Defleur said, however, that archaeologists had found 17 sites with 34 individual burials, indicating that Neanderthals ritually buried their dead. To him, that suggests that cannibalism was the exception rather than the rule.

"The low number of confirmed cases of cannibalism among Neanderthals also shows us that they have possibly the same taboo as we do about the consumption of human flesh. Otherwise, the cases would be much more numerous," he said. "Only the survival of the group made them break this possible moral prohibition."

SEE ALSO: Humans once hunted and butchered giant ground sloths in South America, 12,600-year-old bones reveal

Join the conversation about this story »

NOW WATCH: The most fascinating examples of cannibalism that exist today

from SAI

Dave Bautista Tripped Entering The Ring At WrestleMania 35 And Immediately Got Turned Into An A+ Meme

Dave Bautista Tripped Entering WrestleMania 35 Ring, Got Turned Into A Meme

Getty Image

Dave Bautista faced his old buddy Triple H in a rather brutal farewell match at WrestleMania 35, even getting his nose-ring ripped out with a pair of pliers by The Game before finally succumbing to a sledghammer to the skull and a Pedigree.

Yes, that nose-ring thing really happened.

Following the match the 50-year-old Bautista took to social media to thank the WWE fans for all of their support over the years.

“To all the @wwe fans across the world that gave me the opportunity to suspend your disbelief, thank you,” he wrote. “From the biggest part of my heart thank you for letting me entertain you. Tonight was my story book ending and I wanted to leave you with all I had to give. I’ll miss this theater of violence more than I can express in words but I am officially retiring from Sports Entertainment. I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished, I leave in great health, and without a doubt the show will go on. I had a hell of a run. Thank you for the journey ✌🏼#dreamchaser #wrestlemania35.”

However, before Triple H had even made his annual overblown ring entrance, Bautista entered the ring looking like a completely green jabroni, tripping over the middle rope and so became WrestleMania 35’s most enduring meme.


Mission accomplished.